Fried Baby Artichokes

The day I went out to get the artichokes for Seder salad, Artie was laying on the ground.  Either he uprooted from his own weight or something jumped on him overnight.  I was able to prop up the plant and cut off the largest buds, but he was clearly in trouble.

After Seder, I decided that the few remaining buds weren't going to get any bigger and cut them.  Barely as large as my thumb and mostly tough leaf, I went searching for a way to salvage them.

The Chew had a labor-intensive recipe for twice-fried artichokes.  Their baby artichokes were twice the size of what I was working with, so I've adapted this for the itty-bitty pieces I ended up with.  This method will also work with any size of immature bud, but not a mature one with a choke.

I don't think I've ever discussed the Baby Artichoke debate.  The way an artichoke plant blooms is to put up one thick stalk in the middle, which develops the largest bud.  That is what generally makes it to the market for $3 apiece.  The stalk then branches off into 5 thinner stalks.  The top of those produces what is normally considered "baby artichokes", which are no bigger than a baseball.  Some markets call them Medium, depending on where you live.  Each of those stalks is good for at least one more generation, and I was getting two (down to great-grandbabies of the main bud) until the root snapped.  If those are large enough in a commercial farm, they end up as frozen or marinated artichokes.  They're generally underdeveloped and never build a choke.  So, next time you see "baby artichokes" in the farmer's market, you now know that they're just full-grown later buds that the farmer has named something cute to sell it.

*12 baby artichokes (8 if they're a little larger)
*2 cloves garlic
*1 lemon
olive oil for frying
salt to taste

1.  Fill a small bowl halfway with water.  Squeeze half a lemon into it and drop in the empty peel for good measure.

2.  To prepare the artichokes, tear off the toughest leaves until you start to get down to the more edible ones.  Pare off the skin of the base and short stem, then cut off the top 1/3 of each bud.  Slice into 1/4" thick cross-sections.  I got 3 out of each of mine.  Drop slices in the acidulated water as you go to keep them from turning black.

3.  Once done with the artichokes, drain them while you heat 1/2" of oil in a 10" skillet.  Slice garlic thinly and toss into heating oil.  Once the garlic is browning, the oil is hot enough and you can toss in the artichoke in a single layer.  I highly recommend finding that splatter guard you never use.  Cook until petals brown, turn outward, and get crisp, about 5 minutes.  You can turn them during cooking if they're not submerged.

4.  Remove to a paper towel-lined plate.  Sprinkle with salt, place on a serving plate, and drizzle with juice of remaining lemon half.  Serve hot, maybe with a garlic aioli on the side.

Difficulty rating :)

A New Coat of Paint

When I did my annual clearing out the pantry for Passover, I decided to strip off the old shelf paper and reline everything.  That's when I found out that adhesive contact paper isn't really used anymore.  All I could find was clear or really ugly, so I got padded non-stick liners instead.

Then I stripped off the old paper and found all kinds of horrors underneath.  I don't know if it was mold, syrup, or general rot, but it was scary.  I was in there so long, scrubbing with various chemicals, that the condition of the pantry walls and shelves started to bother me more than usual.  I don't know how many decades it has been since it was painted, and it was a pretty bad job then.

So I've decided to paint the pantry.  I have lots of paint left from various projects, including the adjacent laundry room.  Palest blue refreshed the whole south side of the house and goes with the kitchen.  I also have enough semi-gloss for the shelves and woodwork.

After cleaning.  Need to scrub it again.

Yes, it is going to be cramped in there, but I'm a very small person.  I did my bedroom closet, and parts of that weren't any wider.  The biggest problem is that the shelves were nailed in with thin nails instead of modern wide screws.  I'm not going to be able to take them out, do the painting, and re-install them.  Time to find out just how small I am.

I am not trying to do this in one day, or even two.  This is the only time I'm ever going to paint it, and I plan to do a proper job.  At least this is the time of year when I have the least pantry inventory.  I managed to get everything that is opened into two boxes, which I can stash in the pantry any time the walls or shelves aren't wet.  There are things which can go in the fridge or freezer that I normally don't put in there, like vinegars.  The cat food bucket will go in the pantry every night no matter what.  It isn't like everything is going to be in the hall for two weeks.

I'm also going to change the light bulb.  Yellow?

The Other Side of the Peeler

Everyone at work was saying that the veggie peeler was dull and it was time to get a new one.  I wasn't having that problem, and thought it was another one of their issues that I always seem to have to fix.  I'm Mama Smurf at work.  They were mixing orange juice concentrate by hand for two days because the machine was "broken".  It wasn't turned on.

At home, I was using the peeler a lot one day.  My hand started to get tired, so I switched hands and kept going.  The peeler was a lot sharper on that side, because I hardly ever use it right-handed.  That was when I realized that my co-workers were probably right about the peeler.  I'm the only lefty at work.  My guide knife is sharper and my side of the peeler is more effective.  Maybe I should buy them a new peeler.

Now, if you're not really ambidextrous, I don't recommend switching hands with anything sharp.  Peelers aren't expensive and they do last several years under normal household conditions.  It's just something to consider.

Passover Vegetable Chili

I really did have enough toppings for the potato bar at Seder, but I wanted to make sure there was enough variety so guests could make completely different dishes even if they had two or more potatoes.  Harkening back to the butternut squash chili, I saw that I could easily replace the bulgur with quinoa and just veggie it up enough so you didn't notice the missing beans.  The crimini mushrooms took on the bean texture.  I discovered a few weeks ago by accident that they don't soften much during a short stewing and keep a chewy texture.

I did get it to thicken enough to count as chili, but it can also be thinned out with stock into a soup.  I dropped spoonfuls into the leftover turkey soup as a filling lunch.  In a non-Passover week, you could use it as a vegan protein pasta sauce.

It's always odd to me when the experiments are the memorable dishes.  Honestly, this is what I consider a barely edible leftovers concoction I would make only for me and not for company on a normal day, but it got raves as a new way to use quinoa. It's like the gingered bok choy I made once for seder, assuming most of it would be left over, and instead was completely gone.

And yes, I know many consider cumin kitniyot.  I'm relaxing my personal kitniyot rules to no soy, rice, corn, mustard, or legumes (and their derivatives), but otherwise naturally KLP items processed in a facility with them are ok.  I did experiment with using grapeseed oil instead of olive.  It was terribly expensive for an 8oz bottle, and I only used half the bottle in the entire seder, including salad dressing.  It's light and neutral, but too pricey to become a regular thing.

1/2 C dry quinoa
1/2 C diced red onion
1 15 oz can diced tomatoes
1 red bell pepper, diced
6 oz crimini mushrooms, quartered
1 jalapeño pepper, sliced (optional)
1 Tb chili powder
2 tsp cumin
1 tsp paprika
1 tsp salt
1 C water (or more)

1.  Pre-soak quinoa for two hours to remove residue.  This isn't necessary for health or safety reasons, but it will reduce the starchiness of the chili.  Drain and rinse.

2.  Into a larger saucepan than I used, place quinoa, onion, diced pepper, diced mushrooms, canned tomatoes with their juice, and seasonings.  Add 1 C water and heat to a simmer on medium.  Don't stir yet, because you want the quinoa on the bottom to absorb the liquid.  Cover.

3.  After fifteen minutes of simmering, stir chili and add the jalapeños if you want a spicier chili.  If the quinoa is cooked, you can estimate how thick you want your chili to be.  If it isn't completely done, you may need to add a bit more water.  Simmer for 5 more minutes, then taste and adjust seasonings.  Serve hot as a chili or cold as a salsa.

Makes about 1-1/2 quarts

Difficulty rating  π

Turkey Matzoh Ball Soup

In culinary school, Chef invited some Jewish friends to our restaurant for lunch and assigned me the matzoh ball soup.  I think he had been waiting for a Jewish student for years for this.

I looked at the recipe he handed me.  It had broccoli and mushrooms in it, and no chicken.  I could not in good conscience make the recipe as written.  I got permission to strike out on my own and made what most Jews consider to be matzoh ball soup; mirepoix with a lot of salt and pepper, leftover chicken, and matzoh balls that hopefully don't break any teeth.

I did make my own stock for this one out of the last of the frozen turkey.  There was one wing in the bag, giving me just enough meat for two quarts worth of soup.  The matzoh balls were from a mix, so sorry if you clicked on the link in the hopes of getting a matzoh ball recipe.  Reform Jews reach for the box.

*2 lbs turkey bones with meat on them, like wings or a carcass
2 qts water
*1 bay leaf
*1/2 tsp dried sage
*1/4 tsp peppercorns
*2 C out of the broth bag or:

• 1 onion
• 2 carrots
• 3 stalks celery

1 package matzoh ball mix and whatever you mix into it
salt and pepper to taste (the mix is going to be salty, so go easy)

1.  Brown bones in a large saucepan over medium heat, about 5 minutes.  Add water and simmer, covered, for two hours.

2.  Add 2 cups assorted veggie trimmings or half of the items listed above.  Also add bay leaf, sage, and peppercorns and simmer an additional hour.

3.  Strain out everything until you have just the clear broth.  I used a double layer of cheesecloth over a mesh strainer to keep it as clear as possible.  Place the bones on a cutting board and get as much meat off them as you can.  Everything that isn't chopped turkey gets thrown out.

4.  Return stock and turkey to the pot.  Cut remaining onion, carrot, and celery into attractive pieces and add to the pot.  Simmer for half an hour while the matzoh balls are cooking.  Taste the broth and add salt and cracked pepper as needed.  Serve hot, with one to three matzoh balls per bowl.

Serves about 6-8

Difficulty rating :)

Seder 2017

I started to make my menu, keeping in mind what I have on hand and what was ready to pull in the garden.  Starters are always the same, boiled eggs and gefilte fish.  Then I decided to make matzoh ball soup, making my own stock with the last of the turkey bones in the freezer and using my home grown carrots and celery.

Then I got to the main course, and realized that I'd already planned a whole lot of protein.  Roast anything would get heavy fast.  Did I really dare to make a vegetarian (or even vegan) main course for a dinner party?  I have been to a kosher dairy seder before, and remember being unimpressed because it was all roasted vegetables and potato gratin.  I started thinking of quinoa and roasted veggies, plated in the kitchen, but couldn't come up with an appropriate side.  What would I serve, a baked potato?

And then the light bulb over my head clicked on.  A baked potato bar as the main course!  Like taco night, but on potatoes.  Totally crazy idea, but also really easy to make kosher for Passover.  Omit either meat or dairy and don't serve anything obviously out like beans.  I could easily create a chili around quinoa and veggies.  Since you wouldn't serve chili without sour cream and cheese, that settled it to dairy.  (In my house, separating meat and dairy by courses is the closest we ever get to kosher.)  That made a Greek salad an easy side dish.  Poached pears and ice cream made with my two mature beets finished off the menu.

The potato toppings got a little out of hand.  There were tiny spoons and tongs everywhere.  However, I didn't cut up the avocado because there wasn't enough interest in it.

The potatoes were more filling than I expected.  I had baked up a 5 lb bag so everyone could have two.  With everything else in four courses, no one had the second one.  On the other hand, I don't have to cook for the rest of Passover.

Since I wasn't investing in a meat dish, I sprang for making my own gefilte.  Well, half of my own, and half ground gefilte from Whole Foods.  I bought a whole rainbow trout so I could make fish stock and chopped up the meat to add to the gefilte mix.  I didn't like them as much as the ones I had made entirely on my own, but I was over-extended that week and needed the one shortcut.

Starters:  Boiled Egg, Gefilte Fish

Turkey Matzoh Ball Soup

Main:  Baked Potatoes and Greek Salad

Dessert:  Poached Pears and Beet Ice Cream

Since I didn't want flowers in the house as I recover from bronchitis, my hostess gifts were boxes of matzoh.  So glad I had only bought one box, because now I have the 5-pound case I had tried to avoid buying.

Orange Marmalade

That nasty cold ended up being bronchitis, so I've been kind of out of commission for a while.  The most elaborate thing I've made lately is a pot of wor wonton soup minus the won tons.  Not much to blog about there.

Then I opened my last jar of last year's jam, which happened to be a blueberry, and realized that it's almost Passover and I need more corn syrup-free jams.  It was time to have a major jamming session.  Strawberries and blackberries were on sale at Sprouts, but I needed a third something to make the day worthwhile, preferably of a lighter color and flavor.  I almost asked if I could pick a bag of apricots off the tree at an estate sale, but figured that would be too tacky.

I checked my tree to make sure I had enough lemons not to buy lemon juice, and realized how many Valencia oranges I have been not eating this winter.  I haven't posted an orange marmalade here because I haven't made one.

How to use up a 4 lb bag of sugar in one day

I read a bunch of recipes in the Ball book on how to make marmalade.  It's very labor intensive.  Then I found their recipe that involved tossing the oranges in the food processor.  I was about to use that when I found the Food in Jars recipe for blood orange marmalade and decided that I could apply it to my Valencias without too much more effort than the Ball since I wouldn't have to clean the food processor after.  The reason I read Marisa McClellan's blog is because she makes everything in small batches.  I don't need eight half-pint jars of any one flavor.  That's about how much jam I go through in an entire year.  Yes, this one involves an overnight soak.  So does my strawberry-lavender jam, so I was already doing one two-day jam and might as well add another.

*1 lb oranges (about 3 or 4)
2 1/2 C sugar
3 C water

1.  The night before, wash oranges well.  Cut off top and bottom, slice in half, and remove the seeds and core membranes.  Set those aside in a cheesecloth tied tight.

2.  With a very sharp knife, cut the thinnest slices possible of orange.  Then cut those semi-circles in half to have tons of little quarter slices.  Place those in a bowl with 3 cups of water.  Nestle the cheesecloth bag in the water and refrigerate the whole thing overnight.

3.  If canning, prepare for a 3 C yield.  Discard the cheesecloth bag.  Place the orange slices and water in a medium saucepan with the sugar.  Over medium heat, bring to a boil, stirring occasionally.

4.  Once boiling, reduce the mess by at least 1/3.  It's going to take at least half an hour.  It will get thick and sticky and start to sheet off the spoon.  Check for set with a chilled plate or the wrinkle test.

5.  If not canning, cool and refrigerate.  For canning, spoon into half-pint jars, center lids, screw on rims finger-tight, and process in a boiling water bath for 10 minutes.

Makes about 3 cups

Difficulty rating  :)