The Forest of Mint

This sounds like some fun fantasy story.  It is not.  Stephen King could make his next best-seller with this title.

Remember way back in Mint Sauce, when I talked about keeping mint in a pot?  I wasn't kidding.  There is some in my front yard, which decided to take over because I had way more important things to deal with.  The gardener either gave up or thought I liked it.  I finally realized it was a problem and decided to rip it out.

If any of you have mint planted in the ground anywhere on your property, go now and rip it up.  As in, leave your seat immediately and do it.  I don't care if it's night, or raining, or 200º outside.

Mint does not simply grow, have a root, flower, and make baby mint plants from seeds.  There are flowers and seeds, but it does most of its propagation through stolons, or runners.  These runners branch out just below the surface and give rise to what look like new mint plants several feet away.  That's why you can't just cut off the parts above ground, which would kill most herb plants.  All of the roots must be removed.  When you start to rip out the plants, and get to a runner, you have to pull the whole thing out.  And the runners have roots, and the new plants beget more runners.  You know how they say the only creatures that will be alive after World War Three are cockroaches?  Well, they're going to be eating mint.

The runners also get themselves entangled in the roots of plants that you would rather not rip out.  It's a defense mechanism,  I think.  I've already sacrificed several bushes, and a small tree may end up as collateral damage.  I'm hoping to save the roses.  It's taking a toll on the concrete edge of the planter, and may be partially responsible for a crack in the driveway.  If I can get it down to isolated areas, I can use weed killer for the sprouts in hard to reach places.

And once you have removed all of the visible mint and pulled the roots down to three inches, you have to keep coming back to check on it every couple of weeks.  Forever.  Short of digging out all the dirt in your yard or planter to a depth of two feet, it's going to keep coming back.

The moral of the story: don't plant mint in the ground.